The Beginning of a Dream

MIRROR POSTS: Transient Dreams | livejournal | multiply

I'm "living every moment intensely, fighting for what I want, and believing in my dreams" again. I have someone to thank for that and I do my best not to take him for granted.

Jim is an answered prayer. Last year, I kept praying for God to help me find the person I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with. For a while, I thought God was playing a joke on me. I didn't think it would come so soon! Sometimes it still feels too good to be true. I'd already given up on finding someone like him. I had decided that if I was ever going to get married, it wouldn't be for love. I thought I'd already found the love of my life but even that had to end. I was happy that I'd at least experienced loving someone and being loved for my idiosyncrasies, not in spite of them. How could I have known that something better was waiting for me? I guess it's true that "God only makes happy endings. If it's not happy, it's not the end."

Jim is so wonderful. He makes me so happy. He's everything I've ever wanted in a man and more! He is kind, sweet, funny, smart, responsible, dedicated and most of all, honest; a real man of integrity. He's the most perceptive person I've ever met and he really understands me. And as if God didn't think that was enough, he also happens to be incredibly handsome!

He makes me laugh. He sings to me — little made-up songs that always make me feel as if he's right here with me, holding me close. He wipes away my insecurities. He makes me feel like I'm the most beautiful and intoxicating woman in existence!

And he respects me.
I really couldn't ask for more.

He is my every dream... People say I'm lucky to have him in my life - and I agree - but one said that I probably deserve him. Well, I must have done something really good to deserve him. It's so easy for me to do the right thing now because I know it's the thought of me that keeps him going and I want to be the best person I can be for him.

It's so hard being apart from him but I know someday soon, we'll be together for good. He's a man who can make things happen. He has proven that to me over and over again. I don't mind waiting - I've waited 21 years for him! What's another few months?! ...I just wish I could be with him and comfort him because I know things are so hard for him right now. Just a few hours ago, we talked and he was so sad. He wants to see me but can't. He's only 24 but he told me how he sometimes feels like he's lived the life of a 40-year-old man. He's in a bad place..we're both glad that this part of his life will be over soon.

We talk about our future together - the house we're going to live in, the car we're going to drive, the dogs we're going to have, how we're going to spend our weekends... I realize more and more just how right we are for each other. He told me that if he could have me to talk to and love for the rest of his life, it would be a dream come true. I feel the same way. We share the same values, the same hopes and dreams...and we're willing to do whatever it takes to make our relationship work.

Before he met me, he'd planned on coming home to his family in June. He talked to them about spending his vacation with me. His mom really wanted him to come home but she said, "Love comes first, Jim." I'm so thankful that she understands. I'm so glad that we have the support of both our families. They're happy for us and that makes things easier to bear.

I can't wait to see him smile and know that it's that smile, the one that he reserves just for me. I can't wait to hear him laugh and be able to catch him before he says, "Beat ya again!" when we talk. I can't wait to look into his eyes and know that he's in love with me. ♥

Just three more weeks and I'll be in his arms... I can't wait!!!